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What is more, forks can be used as weapons. Since not all us can get a hold of fancy self-defence weapons like pepper sprays, a good old screwdriver comes in handy. Trust me, you don’t want to mess with a woman with synthetic hair and a screwdriver as a weapon charging at you. You have no idea how the heat from the hair has messed up her thinking. One day, Wambui was in Ngara, combing through cheap colourful mitumba heels. No sooner had she put her left foot inside a nice shoe, when she spotted a Kanjo. Lo and behold, Wambui had to take off with one bare foot and one in her old shoes. The blue slippers in her handbag saved the day despite having had to bear walking back to the office in an official suit and slippers. Women need not call 999 over a broken nail or heel when super glue can do the trick. Truth is, every single hour, they are exposed to reasons for using the super glue or tissue when you take them to those dingy sheebens with a lot of alcohol, but no tissue in the toilet. There is no way a fornication bag cannot have condoms and please, don’t ask her why they’re neither in a pack of threes, nor of the same brand, scent or colour!
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